What Really Is A Bearhug?

Everytime I hear my daughters say, "Mom, kiss and hug!" I would reply back by saying, "Wait a minute!". This happens on a daily basis before my daughters would go to bed every night. Well just to be fair on myself, most of the time I would readily walk over to their room to give them their much deserved kisses and bearhugs without making them wait even for a second.

But what really is a bearhug? In my Writer's Craft class yesterday, we started analyzing a few poems and one of them was a poem by Michael Ondaatje. It gives an explanation on what a bearhug is, as well as evaluating the feeling of hugging his child.

A bearhug is a grappling clinch hold and stand-up grappling position where the arms are wrapped around the other person. A line in the poem says, "Why do I give my emotion an animal's name, give it that dark squeeze of death?" To better understand this line (or the poem as a whole) is to know that an actual hug from a bear can actually kill you. People use this term to define that a tight squeeze hold on another person. For most of us (even everyone), we think of bears as 'cuddly,' 'soft,' 'adorable,' and 'lovable.'

So whenever I hug my kids, it's always a sign of affection, of loving, and of bonding. For your pleasure, here is the poem 'Bearhug.'












Bearhug by Michael Ondaatje


Griffin calls to come and kiss him goodnight

I yell ok. Finish something I'm doing,

then something else, walk slowly round

the corner to my son's room.

He is standing arms outstretched

waiting for a bearhug. Grinning.



Why do I give my emotion an animal's name,

give it that dark squeeze of death?

This is the hug which collects

all his small bones and his warm neck against me.

The thin tough body under the pyjamas

locks to me like a magnet of blood.



How long was he standing there

like that, before I came?